The tragic fate of the Earth Battleship USS O'Neil
by Memories of a shadow
Summary: So I thought of this during my lunch break at work and the words kept coming...so I wrote the thing...got inspired with this character by a really famous Pirate Captain...one shot


Ok this is a little story I thought of during my lunch break at work…it's an one-shot…**The character of Stargate universe don't belong to me bla bla bla…and I only did for fun so don't sue because I don't have the money**

I thought more like an dialogue between characters so this (name) sentence means that that character said that. I'm referring to my character as Jason although this is not his real name

* * *

**The tragic fate of the Earth Battleship USS O'Neil**

The man was starring at him with his incredible calm look, not a hint of remorse just slightly amusement for the situation they were in.

General O'Neil was good at staring contests ….really good…but this man was also good…his whole body relaxed …like he was perfectly safe….well he was …partially since between the two men were the cell bars…and he was safe…temporarily.

He was feeling his people getting uncomfortable …or maybe they were just bored since for the last five minutes the only thing he did was to stare at the man….well technically he was more like a kid….he couldn't have been more then 23 ….well a really smart kid, O'Neill had to admit it…not like Carter-smart, but still smart. After all he made them chase him around several planets, planet systems…he tricked the Jaffa, the Lucian Alliance, the Goa'uld (not that it was really hard doing that), Tok'ra, even the Asgard …but more important he tricked HIM.

This was stupid he was the adult here….staring contests were for children, but still he couldn't let the kid think he won…could he?

(Daniel)-Ahem….Daniel was usually a very patient man…until one point

(Jack)-Yes, Daniel, still keeping his eyes on the kid

(Daniel)-Are you planning on starring like this for the whole day Jack?

(Jack)-I'm not starring….just keeping eye contact

(Sam)-General…

(Jack)-Ok, Carter I get it…so…turning his attention to the man…no kid…so …what have you done to my ship?

(Jason)-Your ship?…his voice was nice and smooth…just like the time he convinced of going on that wild goose chase to look for the "evil" Goa'uld lord. Goa'uld that turned out to be just another Lucian Alliance general…and then get them captured and leave them behind when he escaped with the ship …and the box…O'Neil felt he needed to strangle the kid...

(Jack)-Yes my ship…it had my name…Earth Battleship, USS O'Neil?

(Jason)-Oh…a look of recognition came to the kid's face…..THAT ship.

(Jack)-Yes …what other ship did you steal from us?

(Jason)-Don't remember stealing any ship….

(Jack)- You must have a short on memory then, generally taking something without permission counts as stealing.

(Jason)-Well, there was none around to ask permission

(Jack)-Because you beamed everyone out of the ship….before you stole it

(Jason)-Borrowed it…

(Jack)-Stole

(Jason)-Borrow

(Daniel)-Ahem….Jack….

(Jack)-All right Daniel …let's assume you borrowed it… things you borrow you return.

(Jason)-Oh….so that is how it works?

(Daniel)-Yes, that is how it works

(Jason)-Well, turning his eyes away, that might be a little difficult…

(Jack)-Why?

(Jack)-Well….the ship …you see….

O'Neil sensed disaster coming…

(Daniel)-The ship, what?

(Jason)-Well….it will take a while to return it…

(Jack)-Why's that?

(Jason)-Well there is more then one piece, you know...

(Jack)-One piece of what?

(Jason)-Ship

(Daniel)-Ship!

(Jason)-Yes…there is more then one piece of ship to return…

O'Neil felt his like a big brick wall just crushed on him, the blood raising in his face, hands started trembling….vacuum …yes space vacuum would do the trick…no evidence…and painful or so he heard.

(Sam)-General….

...Carter sounded worried…and she should be, he was ready of breaking the kid's neck

(Jack)-Relax, Carter I'm not going to kill him …yet! Ok…let's start with the beginning shall we….WHAT did you do with my ship?

(Jason)-I don't remember ever agreeing on that aspect!

(Daniel)-Stop fooling around …Jason…if that really is your name

(Jason)-What makes you say that?

(Jack)-Well since from the moment you opened your mouth there was nothing but lies

(Jason)-Now, now…General…there is no use in this…I believed we were friends

(Jack)-Ha…what gave you that idea, friends don't lie, don't stab one another in the back, they don't leave their other friends in the hands of the Lucian Alliance soldiers…and they don't steal things that don't belong to them, they generally don't trick their friends.

(Jason)-Oh come on General….I wouldn't have left you there unless I was sure you would escape, see I trust you would make it...

(Daniel)-Ha…

(Jason)-Its' true….I knew the Tok'ra were around there…it was fairly obvious they would come to the rescue

(Jack)-Well you could have saved us the trouble if you wouldn't have left us gets captured in the first place.

(Jason)-Come on General…you can't possible think I wanted you to get captured?

The kid had such an innocent expression that O'Neil actually wanted to believe him…for a second….or maybe not, the kid was playing him …again

(Daniel)-Admit it Jason, everything you did since the moment we found was so you could steal that box…..Daniel was getting tired of the charade

(Jason)-I resent that, I never had any plans of betraying you.

(Daniel)-You can resent all you want…the fact is you played us so you could reach your own objective….

(Jason)- Doctor Jackson….I never, ever intended of hurting you guys…this is the whole truth, the kid looked actually offended by the accusation…Daniel had to give him credit he would make a great actor.

(Jack)- Ok it you had all those great intention how come nothing you told us was true?

(Jason)- I must admit….that parts of things I told you weren't exactly accurate

(Daniel)-Little things…how abut the Goa'uld lord that oppressed you planet making slaves or your people and killing millions!

(Jason)-Well I admit they were little exaggerations.

(Daniel)-Little….nothing you told us was true….there was no Goa'uld lord just an Alliance base you wanted to infiltrate

(Jason)-I didn't made you do anything you came on your own free will.

(Jack)-Because we believed your story, not only that but we got captured while you stole from you Alliance buddies but you left with our battleship.

(Jason)-Well I may have taken the ship but I was planning of returning it….plus they weren't my buddies…I never met those guys in my life.

O'Neil felt the sudden urge to break the cell bars …."calm down Jack…vacuum…space vacuum".

(Daniel)-Then why did they knew you and why didn't they called you David?

(Jason)-Must have mistaken me with somebody else.

(Jack)-Really?

(Jason)-I'm positive they mistook me with somebody else, my name is not David.

(Daniel)-Is not Jason either is it….Daniel was getting impatient…

(Jason)-Now why would you say that Doctor Jackson ?

(Daniel) -The Tok'ra know another of our names…I wander how many names you have?

(Jason)- That is just…. how do you say….a "nickname"

(Jack)-Nickname!

(Jason)-Yes…I hear you Tau'ri people have something like that…like a name…but is not actually your name.

(Daniel)-And Jason is our nickname?

(Jason)-Well….yes…don't you use nicknames when speaking with your friends.

(Jack)-Let me tell you something kiddo….we are not your friends so you can take that idea out of your mind.

(Jason)-Now that was not necessary General…you don't need to be rude

(Jack)-I am being rude?

(Jason)-Yes you are …but I will cut you some slack since you're probably upset about the ship.

(Jack)-Battleship

(Jason)-That's what I said, battleship

(Jack)-No you haven't

(Jason)-Well that is what I wanted to say anyway

(Daniel)-But you didn't...

(Jason)-Doctor Jackson…..

(Daniel)-Yes Jason, David, Nathani'el…sorry but I don't know your other nicknames…but I suspect it's a long list anyway.

(Jason)-I expected you to be the calm person.

(Daniel)-I am calm…don't I look calm Jack?

(Jack)-You're very calm Daniel

(Daniel)-See, I am calm…the fact that you continue with this ridiculous play is not going to make me mad…not at all…

(Jason)-What play?…I'm not playing anything

(Sam)-Ok stop this….General; Daniel…let me handle this.

(Jack)-Go for it Carter.

(Sam)-So…Jason…do you mind if I call you that?

(Jason)-Not at all Captain Carter.

(Sam)-What was in the box?

There was something in the kid's eyes…for a second…but it something they all caught…yes the box was something really important since he was willing to go all that trouble to get it

(Jason)-What box? But he wasn't as convincing as before, Carter knew she was on the right track.

(Sam)-The box you stole from the Lucian Alliance while we were acting as decoys.

(Jason)-I don't know of any box….

(Sam)-Yes you do, there is no need to hide it Jason….we all saw you beaming up with that box…so what was it…treasure….a weapon…what was in that box that was so precious to you than you would risk capture and betray the Lucian Alliance?

(Jason)-Is not what you think

(Sam)-I bet it isn't ….but if we knew maybe; just maybe we could go easy on you.

(Jason)-Is nothing of importance to you.

(Jack)-Let us decide that….so what was in the box?

(Jason)-Oh….nothing important…just …nothing important...

(Sam)-Jason…if you want our trust you have to trust us as well…

The kid looked confused

(Jason)-Ok so you know I trust you the thing in the box...I think you call it….something like ZPM…

Carter was shocked…-.A zero point module…how, what, how come the Alliance was having something like that…and what you needed it for?

(Jason)-What do I needed what?

(Sam)-Don't play with me Jason, her voice was calm, soothing...but her eyes were determined

The kid was actually trying not to look into Carter's eyes…O'Neil had noticed this from the first moment he entered the room, but at that point he had been to angry to care. But now…maybe the kid was feeling guilt, remorse…maybe…or he was just playing them as before….he nodded to Carter to continue…they might get their answers or at least some clues.

(Sam)-So…what do you need a ZPM for?

(Jason)- Well I needed it

(Jack)-For what purpose?

- …

(Sam)-Jason?

(Jason)-What's in it for me?

(Sam)-What? Carter was actually confused...

(Jason)-What's in it for me if I tell you? You won't release me either way...

(Jack)-Who knows…we might speak a word or two in your defence, O'Neil was bluffing…if it was after him he would let the kid spend the next 20 years behind bars.

(Jason)-You'll do that for me O'Neil….I guess you really are my friend.

(Sam)-Sarcasm doesn't suit you Jason...

(Jason)-He started it….

….great now they played the"who started it" game….

(Sam)-Jason….

(Jason)-Yes Captain

(Sam)-What do you need a ZPM?

(Jason)-….to move a ship

(Jack)-To move a ship?

(Jason)-A special ship

(Sam)-What kind of ship?

(Jason)-An Ancient ship

(Jack)-Ancient ship…

(Jason)-You know the guys that build the Stargate system…a ship made by them

(Sam)-We know what an Ancient ship is

(Jason)-Oh

(Jack)-So …where is it…this Ancient Ship?

(Jason)-Around..

(Sam)-Around …

(Jason)-Yes, I kind of…lost it

(Sam)-You lost a ship, and entire ship!

(Jason)-Well lost is not exactly the word…more like misplaced it

(Jack)-How does one misplace a ship?

(Jason)-Well I left it somewhere and when I returned it wasn't there.

(Daniel)-So somebody took it?

(Jason)-It's a possibility

(Sam)-Why did you had an ancient ship?

(Jason)-It's a long story

(Daniel)-We have time...

(Jason)-Are you sure? it's a boring story I'm sure the General would rather shoot somebody then listen to a long….

(Jack)-...Careful...

(Jason)-….and really boring story…I'm sure you have allot of work General.

O'Neil was thinking about the tons of paperwork he had on his office….any boring story was better then that.

(Jack)-We'll go with the boring story

The kid was not looking forward to start….maybe he did feel some remorse after all.

(Jack)-Well, we're all ears…

(Jason)-That's a really interesting expression

(Sam)-Jason

(Jason)-Yes

(Sam)-…Story …long, boring story…

(Jason)-Oh yes…well I found it

(Jack)-That wasn't a really long story

(Jason)-It's the short version

(Daniel)-There is a short version?

(Jason)-Yes

(Sam)-So you just found it?

(Jason)-Yes

(Sam)-Where?

(Jason)-Space

(Jack)-Space is a really big place you know.

(Jason)-Well I kind of was looking for it

(Sam)-For the ship?

(Jason)-Yes

(Sam)-Why?

(Jason)-Well…at one time…I was on a planet …and they had this artefact…

(Sam)-Yes

(Jason)-It was supposed to be some kind of treasure….

(Sam)-Yes

(Jason)-And I king of….

(Jack)-…Steal…

(Jason)-..Took it without permission…

(Sam)-Yes

(Jason)-And it was some kind of information storage device

(Jack)-Yes

(Jason)-And I found it

(Daniel)-What?

(Jason)-The ship's location

(Sam)-Do you still have it?

(Jason)-Like I've said I've misplaced it

(Jack)-Not the ship the device

(Jason)-Ohhmm…well kind of….

(Sam)-Meaning?

(Jason)-I don't have the actual device…

(Jack)-You misplaced that one to?

(Jason)-Not exactly

(Sam)-But?

(Jason)-It broke

(Jack)-Broke?

(Jason)-Yes, turned to dust actually

(Jack)-What?

(Jason)-Yes…puff ...just like that… into thin air

(Jack)-Really?

(Jason)-Really

(Sam)-So you lost the information?

(Jason)-Not exactly

(Daniel)-Oh

(Jason)-I still have the information

(Jack)-Really?

(Jason)-Yeah

(Sam)-Did you copy it?

(Jason)-Sort of

(Jack)-Meaning?

(Jason)-It self copied…

(Sam)-Oh

(Jason)-In my head, you know….

(Jack)-Meaning you have the information?

(Jason)-Not exactly

(Sam)-But what?

(Jason)-Well it's there …I just can't remember it...

(Jack)-Really?

(Jason)-Yep

(Daniel)-Interesting….but you remembered where the ship was?

(Jason)-Yes

(Jack)-Why?

(Jason)-I don't know

(Sam)-Ok….so how did you know where to find the ZPM?

(Jason)-Well that's anther long, boring story

(Jack)-Short version

(Jason)-Yes…the ZPM was another artefact we took without permission from that planet

(Daniel)-We….

(Jason)-Me and ….

(Daniel)-The Alliance general whom you weren't acquitted and mistook you for somebody else called David?

(Jason)-We weren't exactly acquainted….

(Jack)-You just said you BOTH took it..

(Jason)-We were more like one time partners

(Jack)-Partners?

(Jason)-Yes

(Jack)-So …you stole an ancient device somehow got that knowledge inside your heard…stole a ZPM, stole our ship so you can start the ancient ship…somehow lost the ancient ship…and in the end…destroy our ship…what did I miss?

(Daniel)- Got rescued by the Tok'ra while drifting in deep space in space shuttle….the one from the O'Neil, manage to run away with one of their ships and some precious artefact they didn't want to disclose and crush that ship into our Beta Site

(Jason)-Oh …yes…that one

(Sam)-What about the Asgard

(Jack)-Oh yes…I'm kind of curios about that one myself, why do the Asgard what you?

(Jason)-The Asgard?

(Jack)-You know…little grey people with big heads …

(Jason)-Oh….those Asgard

(Daniel)-Those Asgard

(Jason)-Well…I kind of borrowed something from them to

(Sam)-You stole something from the Asgard!

(Jason)-Took it without permission…with every intent of returning it

(Jack)-Besides the point….why would you do that?

(Jason)-I need it so I could start the ship

(Sam)-I thought you only needed the ZPM..

(Jason)-Well yes.

(Jack)-But ….

(Jason)-But I needed also something they made …they really didn't need it; it was in a storage facility unguarded.

(Jack)-Well I bet it was unguarded …why anyone would want to steal…

(Jason)-Borrow…

(Jack)-Oh…give me a break…

(Jason)-That's an interesting expression

(Jack)-Shut up

(Jason)-Ok

(Daniel)-So …when did you steal this thing from the Asgard?

(Jason)-After I left with your ship

(Jack)-Battleship

(Jason)-That's what I've said

(Jack)-No you didn't

(Jason)-Yes I did

(Sam)-General….Jason

(Jason)-Sorry Captain Carter…but he

(Sam)-Yes I know, he started it…so the thing you stole from the Asgard.

(Jason)-boro…

(Sam)-Borrowed with every intention of returning ….

(Jason)-Yes

(Sam)-This thing…what was it?

(Jason)-You know…

(Sam)-No we don't

(Jason)-A thing

(Jack)-What did this thing do?

(Jason)-Oh...nothing important

(Daniel)-Really

(Jason)-Yes…

(Sam)-Meaning?

(Jason)-It was more like kind of like a weapon…

(Jack)-A weapon

(Jason)-Yes

(Jack)-Why did you need a weapon to start a ship?

(Jason)-Well…I needed a weapon to get those tinny robots disabled

(Daniel)-Tinny robots?

(Jason)-Yes

(Jack)-When did those come into the story?

(Jason)-They where before

(Jack)-Before what?

(Jason)-Before I found the ship

(Jack)-Ship

(Jason)-The ancient ship

(Jack)-Hmmm, you never said anything about tinny robots before

(Jason)-I must have said something. They are really important

(Jack)-I know

(Jason)-Without them I wouldn't have borrow the Asgard device

(Jack)-You don't say….

(Jason)-It's true. They were swarms of them…they were invading my ship

(Daniel)-What ship?

(Jason)-The ancient ship

(Daniel)-How come it's YOUR ship?

(Jason)-Well I found it so it's mine

(Daniel)-So let me get this straight…the robots were on the ship before or after you found it

(Jason)-Before

(Daniel)-So technically they found it first

(Jason)-Well, yes

(Daniel)-So it's actually their ship

(Jason)-Well yes if you put it this way

(Daniel)-So you were going to steal from tinny robots as well…

(Jason)-No actually I was going to disable the tinny robots and then take the ship

(Jack)-Ok, never mind Daniel….so you took the Asgard device….got into the place you left the ship didn't found it what then?

(Jason)-So I was looking for the ship…and I found another ship

(Jack)-Oh…this is good…I guess it was a Goa'uld?

(Jason)-Well yes

(Sam)-I know where this is going…they wanted to capture the O'Neil.

(Jack)-What?

(Sam)-The ship, sir

(Jack)-Battleship Carter

(Sam)-Right, sorry sir

(Jason)-Well yes at first, after they just wanted to destroy it

(Jack)-Oh, any chance of telling us why they wanted to destroy MY ship?

(Jason)-It's a long story

(Jack)-Another story ….I bet it's boring too… let us hear the short version

(Jason)-Some time ago I had a tinny involvement in a rebellion on one of the Jaffa planets where this particular Goa'uld lord was ruling.

(Daniel)-Tinny?

(Jason)-Yes, small, tinny…actually the thing would have worked fine without my involvement as well so I don't know why he kept having a grudge against me?

(Jack)-So …that is why you're wanted by the Jaffa as well?

(Jason)-Actually I'm not so sure about that part

(Jack)-Never mind…so they started shooting The O'Neil

(Jason)-Yes

(Jack)-And then?

(Jason)-Well it's a big ship…with lots of buttons

(Daniel)-Aha

(Jason)-I mean I'm not a pilot…there are allot of things I don't know about Earth technologies

(Sam)-Aha

(Jason)-And some of those buttons have interesting markings and writing I don't understand

(Jack)-Right

(Jason)-Like a big red button inside a plastic casing

(Sam)-The one with the word "self-destruct" on it?

(Jason)-Yes…that one

(Jack)-You didn't

(Sam)-I think he did

(Daniel)-Oh boy

* * *

I actually got inspired for my character buy a famous pirate …

So…what you think?

...and I know the Battleships, Battle-cruiser in Stargate didn't had a big red button with "self-destruct" word on it...Well they should have had one...


End file.
